she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
