idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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