Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
They took my balls.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
