Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
