walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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