I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
i think i just lost a toe
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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