no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
