I'd wear matching sweaters with you
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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