that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
