I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
