She is in my trunk
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
