Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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