so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
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I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
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WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize