Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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