i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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