Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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