I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
