Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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