where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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