Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
