the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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