Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers