adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
