I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
