you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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