Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I'm going to jail i love you
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
