I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
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