There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
