she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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