Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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