It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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