god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
