you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
It was confusing and full of hummus
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
