how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're making bets on your personal life
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize