I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
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