States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
