I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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