If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
