THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
