singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Randomize
