I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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