Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
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