oh fat girl friday strikes again...
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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