I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
