we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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