Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
You made out with two different species that night
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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