We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
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