It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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