Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
