so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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